My name is Xanthe Wyse. I have been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), social anxiety disorder.
My hyperarousal energy levels are very high in this video as in the previous video I talked about some a very triggering topic (religious extremism, control, abuse). I danced for a bit, changed into a red T-shirt, applied red lipstick and showed you how I dance, sing to help discharge the hyperarousal energy.
I have the shutdown presentation of PTSD, so can look quite calm even when I have very high energy states. The hyperarousal feels very similar to going into fight or flight or high levels of anxiety but I don’t show on my face how much the energy is. It comes out in more tics and movements though.
Hyperarousal happens with my trauma processing.
In this video, I have shown one of the ways I discharge the hyperarousal energy. Dancing to high energy music (usually I would stand up and move more or dance-walk). It doesn’t matter if it looks or sounds silly. It’s been therapeutic and helped me manage my conditions which come with a lot of anxiety.
All the dance movements are improvised. The other movements (which some people call stims or tics) are subconscious and not intentionally done. They come out because I have so much energy. You many notice this in several of my videos. It’s actually one of the reasons people on social media keep insisting I’m autistic (I have traits better explained by other diagnoses).
If you compare this to a video 4 months ago of myself dancing in a red dress (high with hypomania) to the same song, I am not quite as energetic as then. If my mood is elevated hypomania or mania, the hyperarousal is even more extreme.
After this video, I went for a solitary dance walk and listened & sang along to songs & now feel much calmer. If I want to calm it a different way, I can chose a different song and do painting (go into a trance). But for me, the energy is best to come out in movement and then gradually calm.