Processing name change from trauma with music and messy painting.

My name is Xanthe Wyse. Diagnosed bipolar disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), social anxiety disorder.

Currently processing my name change which took place in a psychiatric unit in 2015. I went in with legal name Miranda came out with legal name Xanthe. I changed my name because it became such a massive trigger with PTSD that I was having panic attacks with re-experiencing.

This painting is a sign for a video I want to make smashing up my old laptop which is linked. I painted the words without music. Then added glazes of colour listening to music.

I listened to Renegade Fighter (Zed) – the words on this painting are words from the lyrics rearranged, “pieces rearranged” as the song says.
Then Thunderstruck (ACDC).
Then Bring me to Life (Evanescence). That’s when I started filming – when adding metallics messily to finish. Including along all the broken pieces smashed apart by trauma.

This is actually how I have done most of my paintings (most without words).

I intend to smash the red laptop (on the floor) with a sledgehammer next few days. I was making the sign to go with it as an creative expression piece.

Source: Youtube