My name is Xanthe Wyse. I have been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, social anxiety disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
Music and movement & improvised creative expression helps me to process grief and trauma as well as relieves my anxiety. Improvisation and imperfection actually is better for me.
I can actually sing in tune but I am singing flat (as most people do when listening to music with ear-buds). This doesn’t matter as it is still very freeing. Whereas trying to make something perfect actually brings out perfectionism and anxiety for me. Perfectionism increases anxiety for me.
I forget what most of the lyrics are (short-term memory issues) so I have them in front of me.
My paintings are actually quite messy. They are improvised and messy. I break the rules. That makes me feel less anxious. I get a lot of ‘energy’ with bipolar and anxiety so movement and creative expression helps reduce the anxiety.
I am singing along to ‘I Got You’ by Split Enz. I have a selection of songs that express what I want to say. Songs for different moods. Have been more anxious lately, so listening to music more. Movement to music helps me too.