The holidays are on us and many of my clients and I have been discussing how to manage visiting the dysfunctional family.
To clarify some things, the frontal lobes are the part of the brain that goes off line when we are triggered. Keeping our frontal lobes online is the name of the game when it comes to trauma.
Being triggered (fight/flight/freeze/shame/submit) engages adrenaline which shuts down the frontal lobes.
The frontal lobes allow us to think clearly, stay calm, know what to do. When we feel like we are at our best, they are usually online.
Hope you find this helpful.
Also, my examples may not apply to you. I made this video to just educate about being able to stay in the moment, not lose ourselves, and not be reactive when we are dealing with family dysfunction.
I do not mean to convey that normal stuff is toxic. Meaning if dad passes out on the couch after a huge meal…no biggie.
If he passes out because he’s been drinking all day…it’s a thing.