“ You probably think this world is a dream come true…” / [TW: VENT] / Read desc for info

tw: mentions of mental illness

so before you read the vents i just wanted to say that i personally think that faking mental illnesses is dumb, it’s making fun of other disorders and it’s un respectful. I would never do such thing, so please don’t comment stuff like: “she’s doing it for attention…” etc. Thanks… 🙂

info before you start reading: Ok so before i start venting you must know that i have Anxiety and Social Anxiety.

Social Anxiety: A chronic mental health condition in which social interactions cause irrational anxiety.
For people with social anxiety disorder, everyday social interactions cause irrational anxiety, fear, self-consciousness and embarrassment.
Symptoms may include excessive fear of situations in which one may be judged, worry about embarrassment or humiliation or concern about offending someone.

Anxiety: A mental health disorder characterised by feelings of worry, anxiety or fear that are strong enough to interfere with one’s daily activities.
Examples of anxiety disorders include panic attacks, obsessive-compulsive disorder and post-traumatic stress disorder.
Symptoms include stress that’s out of proportion to the impact of the event, inability to set aside a worry and restlessness.

(For the people who don’t know the difference between the two)

Vents / TW
(non of these relate to each other, each vent is a different story)

Vent 1: I always feel like i’m being judged, my Social Anxiety has gotten so bad that i’m actually embarrassed to talk. I feel like if I say something wrong people would laugh or start judging me. I’m terrified of giving presentations in front of class, and the worst part is that i’m scared to open up to my parents since i think they would tell me that i’m “exagerating” or “it’s just a phase”. I’m concerned about myself and going to school isn’t as easy anymore. I feel like every time I walk down the field people are staring at me and judging…it’s very hard to put into words but it’s not a pretty feeling :/

Vent 2: I cry every single night, and i’m not able to sleep properly because i’m worried about something. I’m an over thinker, and as the name says i tend to overthink everything and the fact that i have anxiety makes it worse. I can’t focus at school since i don’t get sleep, my grades go down, and i’m worried about the fact that my parents would be mad or that i won’t have a future.

I keep my feelings bottled up because of my SA and you seriously don’t know how much it hurts… I asked my few friends to describe my personality and the most repeated ones were:

“PERFECT” (?!)
and more.

If they knew everything that’s happening to me they wouldn’t describe me like that. I’m just saying that i’m overwhelmed, and the only way i can release my feelings is either talking to people i don’t even know or crying all night.

Sorry if this made you uncomfortable
And please don’t mention my mental disorders in the comments
thank you

Source: Youtube